General Fat Guy Stuff

The Top Eight Easter Candies I Didn’t Eat


Well, since I avoided all of those carbs and candies this weekend, what exactly did I miss out on?  Why, these fantastic gooey mounds of deliciousness of course:


8. Other, by the Big Brands

Because my kids tend to go for the pure sugar rush, they leave these around to get eaten by mom and dad.  All chocolate bars should be this size, it’s like the perfect amount of Milky Way or Three Musketeers.  Honorable mention:  we didn’t have these in the house, but for the most part the egg-shaped versions of all of these are great.  Especially the Nestlé’s Crunch version.

jelly beans

7. Jelly Beans

I mean, sure, if you can get your hands on some premium Jelly Belly’s you’ve got something.  But for the most part you get the Brach’s version which are only good for a quick fix.  They are good for stuffing Easter baskets and plastic eggs with!

peeps6. Peeps

Easter’s version of Candied Yams.  Eaten once a year.  Marshmallows are just fine, and great in S’Mores, but covered in sugar?  Well, if you color it yellow I might eat 12…


5. Sprees and Smarties

Just sugar, but even the kids don’t buy these if they have a choice (perfect size for the two year old to stuff his mouth with, though).


4. Hollow Chocolate Bunnies

Everyone makes their own, but they’re mostly tasty, if hard to clean up.  The kids have a tendency to leave these behind.  Which is great for me!  Unless it’s Palmer chocolate…

creme eggs

3. Cadbury Crème Eggs

When I was a kid, my father got a job in which somehow they were like a distributor for Cadbury.  So we had too many of these.  They would sit around the house until the cream inside turned into a sugar sludge.  For a few years I swore off.  But once a year now that time has passed they’re amazing.  Honorable Mention:  Caramel and Chocolate Fudge versions, all underutilized.

mini eggs

2.  Cadbury Mini Eggs

This is where Cadbury shows Mars ‘What’s Up!’  These are M&M’s with a better, harder shell, and higher quality chocolate.  Also great for stuffing plastic eggs.  I’d be kidding if I said I had never eaten one of these left behind from the previous Easter.


1. Reece’s Peanut Butter Eggs

Feel free to reserve this space for Reece’s every holiday.  Reece’s Trees, Reece’s Hearts, Reece’s Turkey Stuffing.  If I actually missed one candy, this was it.  The Eggs version is better than the actual version, better ratio of peanut butter to chocolate.  Perfection.


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